“Create joy and happiness for others by, joyously giving unconditionally to others your time, interest, connections and support. You will receive joy and happiness in return.”

–Fearless Networking Principle

In today’s economic recession, it’s unusual if you don’t know someone who is out of work and looking for a job. Following are 10 suggestions on helping an out-of-work friend in his or her job search:

1. Understand that your friend must go through a grieving process (shock, denial anger, 

    guilt, depression/withdrawal, acceptance) and, that it takes time to grieve. Avoid phrases

    like “you need to get on with your life.” Just sitting and listening is most appropriate at

    the beginning.

2. Encourage your friend to consider joining a job support group like a ministry group for

    people in job transition.

3. Buy a book on networking for a job. Of course, I will first suggest going to

    www.fearlessnetworkers.com and ordering my e-book “How to Fearlessly Network for a

    Job.”  Another good job and career book is by Sally Hogshead called “Radical

    Careering.”

4. Give positive reinforcement. Encourage the friend to look at the positive side of being laid

    off, the opportunity for self-discovery. Surveys suggest that 50-70% of workers are

    unhappy with their job/career. This could an opportunity to reassess career choices or

    consider self-employment.

5. Take your friend to a business expo or industry trade show. Getting out and meeting

    others in the industry always helps your friend stay on top of the latest happenings in the

    industry.

6. Provide a referral in the form of a job referral, informational interview with an associate or

    contacts in the recruiting/staffing business.

7. Tactfully suggest that the friend be an active rather than passive job searcher. Passive

    job searchers tend to spend and exorbitant amount time applying for jobs online and

    mailing out resumes. Active job searchers are attending networking functions, being

    active in job support groups, meeting referrals and are personally dropping off resumes.

8. Be an empathetic listener. However, don’t forget to share words of encouragement and

    favorite positive quotations.

9. Help recall good times. Remember, laughter is truly the best medicine.

10. If your friend appears to be battling depression encourage him or her to seek help from

     a grief Counselor; if appropriate his pastor or Rabbi.

11. Purchase or recommend an inspirational book. If you don’t know which to choose,

     suggest “50 Self-Help Classics” by Tom Butler-Bowdon.

12. If your out-of-work friend has not joined a social networking site like linkedin, Twitter and

      FaceBook, strongly recommend that they do so. There are helpful articles on how to

      find a job through linkedin, Twitter and FaceBook. Simply doing a Google search on

      this topic will provide excellent resources.

For more information about “Fearless Networking,” go to www.fearlessnetworkers.com.

“With trust, your message will comfort others, relax them, and bind them more closely to you.” –Sally Hogshead, author of “Fascinate: Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and Captivation.”

Ever wonder, why business networking seems to not be working for you? You’ve been really putting a lot of effort into networking for over a year. You give many more referrals than you get. Others in your networking group tend to get considerably more than you get. You attend networking events and have no trouble approaching others and discussing business with them. You have even offered a fee if the referral turns into a contract. You begin to question whether the popular statement that “word of mouth advertising is the best form of advertisement” is a fact or a myth. Some people quit networking groups before examining whether they could be the main reason why they are not getting referrals from their group. Following are 7 reasons why networking may not be working for you:

1.         In networking situations, a tendency to focus more on what’s in it for me, rather 

            than how can I help or contribute. You are failing to first build a relationship before

            promoting your product or service. You are failing to build trust and trust is the

            foundation of all healthy relationships. This type of behavior says that you care

            more about you than you do about me. The old adage, “People don’t care how

            much you know, until they know how much you care,” rings so true in this

            situation.

2.         Not giving networking enough time to work. Dr. Ivan Misner, Founder and CEO of

Business Networking International says, that “for some professions, it could take as long as a year and a half to begin getting the quality and frequency of referrals you desire from your business networking efforts.”

3.         Not being specific enough when describing your ideal prospective referral to your

            network associates who are striving to acquire referrals for you. This may seem

            simple to rectify. However, a lot of business people aren’t clear about who their

            target market is. A 30 seconds elevator pitch and a one minute product or service

            presentation sometimes isn’t enough to help someone understand how to market

            you. It takes a one-on-one meeting with open-ended questions like: What are your

            top service or product offerings?, Where do I find likely referrals for you?, What

            makes you different from your competition? What testimonials and case studies

            are available for me to review that backs up what you are telling me? Author’s note:

            A one-on-one meeting should never be one sided. Make absolutely clear that both

            of you will be asking each other the above open-ended questions. If the other

            person seems to only want to talk about him or herself, then this may not be the

            referral sharing relationship you want. See number 1 above and the next to last

            sentence in number 6 below.

4.         Trying to be all things to all people. Most talented and creative people are good at multiple things. Just because you are good at something does not mean it should be part of your portfolio offering. Do you want to be branded as a “Jack-of-all-trades and a Master of None?”

5.         Not understanding and properly applying the law of reciprocity (giving and receiving). Just because you have given a referral to someone does not mean you should demand or expect one from that person in return. Business networkers who understand and properly apply the law of reciprocity believe that givers always receive back.

6.         Not knowing how to gently prod for a referral. This reason seems to contradict reason number 5 above. But, it really doesn’t. Immediately after giving a referral saying “Here’s how you can help me” is just a confirmation of a referral sharing arrangement you have with that person you just gave a referral to. After all, business networking is about building relationships with people you can count on to share information, advice, resources and referrals. You should make clear your desire for a referral sharing relationship before looking for, finding and giving a referral.

7.         Not knowing what your value proposition (VP) is or what makes you different from your competition. Being able to clearly state what your VP is can go along way in presenting you and your product or service, as a smart solution fit for a prospective referral.

Learn more about Fearless Networking at www.fearlessnetworkers.com Or call 832-368-4434.

According to BBC News, as quoted in “Fascinate: Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and Captivation” by Sally Hogshead: “The addictive nature of web browsing can leave you with an attention span of nine seconds—the same as a goldfish.”

Your reputation and judgment is on the line when you make a referral. Do the following things to greatly reduce the likelihood of providing a referral that may prove harmful to your reputation or to your personal or professional relationship with the associate you are referring:

1. Strive to build professional relationships with the associates you are referring first before giving them as a referral. This includes your social networking associates on linkedin, FaceBook, et al. It is very important that you know about the professionalism and work ethic of your associates before you refer. Fearless networkers know that, even in the fast paced Internet environment (see the above quote) that it is worth the time and effort to build referral-sharing relationships first before making a referral.

   2. Try to personally use the services of the associate you are referring; if you have a need

       for, and the means to acquire their product or service.

   3. If you don’t have first hand knowledge of the quality of the product or service being

       offered by the associate you are referring, request testimonials, case studies and

       contact information from satisfied clients of the associate you are referring. Visiting the

       web site of your referral often proves helpful in gaining more insight about their

       products and service. Most web sites have testimonials and case studies of satisfied

       customers.

   4. Let the person receiving your referral know upfront that you desire a referral-sharing

       relationship. Once you get an agreement on this, then it’s just a matter of giving a

       gentle reminder to the receiver that you both are in a referral-sharing relationship, when

       it appears the giving of a referral is one-sided. Coming only from you.

    5. Ask the person receiving your referral to copy you on future e-mail or social media

        communication with your referral. You need to know if your referral (associate) is

        following through and providing excellent service. It is also important to know if the

        person receiving your referral is following through on their end.

    6. Try, if practical, to make a personal face-to-face introduction or at the least a phone

        introduction. Personal introductions have a much better chance of developing a

        professional or business relationship with the receiver of your referral than a business

        card only referral.

     7. Ask the person receiving your referral how serious are they about needing or wanting

         the service or product being offered by the associate you are referring. The receiver of

         your referral does not have to purchase or use the service of your referral, however,

         it’s common courtesy to let you know that they have followed through and made 

         contact with your referral.

 Find out more about Fearless Networking at www.fearlesnetworkers.com.

“Fear exists only when you’re focused inward”
–Mary Kay Ash

In my opinion, networking at trade shows, conventions and business expos is quite simple when you know how to make connections fearlessly. Follow these steps to dramatically boost your efforts at making the right contacts at these venues:

1. Have a written plan with 3 hot topic areas that you would like more information on and 3 professional development skill areas you would like to enhance. Seek to gain this knowledge and information not only in presentations/workshops and at expo booths, but also from contacts you meet in the hallways between these events.

2. Prior to walking into a job fair and trade show, convention or expo-type event, visualize yourself confidently greeting others with warmth, sincerity and enthusiasm. The key here is to use visualization (seeing you taking positive action) with emotion.

3. Then focus solely on being of service to others. Ask yourself: How can I help others to feel good about them selves? And how can I contribute to this person professionally? When your focus is on “how can I get others to feel good about me?” you come across as insincere and, perhaps, needy. When you focus on helping others you come across as caring. Caring attracts.
4. Set a reasonable objective of the number of people you will help. A good rule of thumb is to meet one person in between each presentation and during each break.

5. Look to connect with others that impress you with their knowledge/ideas through their comments and questions in presentations and at expo booths. Target the connections that match your written plan topic areas.  Before setting out to meet a connection, think about what you may be able to add to a conversation in your topic area.  

6. Strive to spend at least 10 minutes to begin building a relationship and to plan at a later time to communicate via phone, e-mail or social networking sites such as Linkedin, Twitter or FaceBook. If there appears to be a strong mutual interest in getting to know each other professionally, you may suggest meeting in between the next presentation or during the next break or for lunch or dinner to continue your conversation. If you’re at the venue for several days plan to meet before the end of the trade show, convention or expo.

7. After introducing yourself with a smile and firm handshake, start off by talking about the venue or even the weather to break the ice. Compliment the person on what impressed you and then begin to identify common ground by talking about family, interests and a work related topic.

8. When complimenting or giving positive re-enforcement to others, always use evidence to support your compliment. For example, “Sue, you were very helpful to Frank, offering him on-target advice on how to solve his dilemma.” Or, “Bob your presentation on the latest technology was very informative. I learned a lot of practical, useful advice.”
9. Keep your network of associates in the forefront of your mind. Be ready to help others with a referral by learning more about the other person’s job or business frustrations, concerns, needs and wants. Also, you can learn more by listening actively and attentively.
10. When in direct conversation, make sure that you get enough information (behavioral examples) through using open-ended questions beginning with who, what, when, where or how. This will help identify members of your network qualified to assist the connection with a solution to their needs, concerns, frustration or wants, if you can’t

To learn more about fearless networking, go to www.fearlessnetworkers.com or follow and link with Ken on Twitter, FaceBook, Linkedin or Plaxo.

“The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.” – Maya Angelou

Business and job networkers are perhaps missing out on opportunities to develop new business or land the right job respectively, due to a failure to understand and utilize a myriad of social media features and tools available to them. Following is my attempt to enlighten you. I hope I’m successful:

1. Job Networkers: Failure to see and use Twitter as a major job search tool.
2. Job Networkers: Not knowing that one can apply for a job using Twitter.
3. Job Networkers: Not understanding how to capture the attention of employers and recruiters using the “Wow factor” in tweeting your job qualifications in Twitter’s 140 characters.
4. Business Networkers: Not understanding how to capture the attention of potential customers by being able to tell or communicate your story in Twitter’s 140 characters.
5. Business & Job Networkers: Not having a “giver first” attitude of putting links to helpful resources, Blogs, articles of interest and white papers in your status updates.
6. Business & Job Networkers: Only contacting your linked friends when in need of referrals.
7. Business & Job Networkers: Social media profiles and biographies are written without regard to keywords or key phrases that will get you noticed by potential customers or employers.
8. Business & Job Networkers: Failure to target companies you would like to do business with or work for.
9. Business & Job Networkers: Failure to re-establish relationships first before communicating with those friend links you haven’t contacted in a long time. (See related blunder #6 above).
10. Business & Job Networkers: Failure to define your value proposition (what differentiates you from your competition) in your profile.
11. Job Networkers: Not dressed in a professional manner in social media profile photos.
12. Business & Job Networkers: Not knowing and understanding the full features and tools available in social media services like Twitter, FaceBook, Linkedin and Plaxo.
13. Business & Job Networkers: You only use, the “soft (casual conversation) side” of Twitter and FaceBook and not the available job search or business related tools.
14. Business & Job Networkers: Not commenting or tweeting in status updates about your job search or business development success.
15. Business & Job Networkers: Not commenting or tweeting in status updates to say ‘thank you” to your linked friends for referrals, article and Blog links related to job search or new business development areas.
16. Business & Job Networkers: Failure to update profiles/biographies with revisions to business or employment status and contact information in a timely manner.
17. Business & Job Networkers: Not checking profiles of link friend requests before clicking the “accept” button. You may miss referral opportunities or fail to notice negative or unflattering information.
18. Business & Job Networkers: Failure to realize that personal Blogs or stories can be viewed by existing and potential employers or customers and have negative repercussions.
19. Business & Job Networkers: Failure to read in full the ‘Terms and Conditions” of social media sites. This can lead to unwanted capture of personal information by third parties, unwanted spam and even identity thief.
20. Job Networkers: Failure to use proper grammar in comments, Blogs, profiles, and biographies. Most employers and decision makers seek good communicators. The most common grammatical errors deal with the proper usage of “I versus me” “Who versus whom” “Its versus It’s” and “That versus which.”
21. Business & Job Networkers: Not understanding that building relationships is the foundation of face-to-face and social media networking.

Follow Ken on Twitter, FaceBook, Linkedin and Plaxo. Visit his web site www.fearlessnetworkers.com.

“Don’t Play “Card Games.” Be Wary of those who do.” –Susan RoAne, author”The Secrets of Savvy Networking.”

Using your business cards effectively is one way to demonstrate your professionalism. Since most business cards are handed out during the introduction, the first impression you make with a connection can be positive or negative. Depending on how you present your card. Following are 21 ways to effectively use business cards:

1. At networking events, don’t give out business cards immediately upon introducing yourself. This behavior can derail further conversation, other than cursory, polite banter about each other’s business. Instead, read the business card you received.
2. Then begin a dialog using three simple steps: (1) Ask the right questions (who, what, when, where, and how) building rapport with questions like: “What do you think about the weather we are having?” “What family do you have in the area?” (2) Listen to the needs of the individual (3) Tie the needs to the product or service of your fellow networkers. Examples of questions to ask to identify needs, issues, concerns and wants are: What are your top 2 challenges at work? What 3 people would you like to meet in 2010? Once you identify a need you can assist with personally, set up a meeting to discuss how you can meet that need or match the need to someone in your network you can refer the person to, for example: “I know someone that does an excellent job with web design, her name is…”
3. Jot down highlighted trigger words indicating the needs mentioned by the person you interviewed. Later transfer this information to your manual or electronic database on your PC, Blackberry or Personal Digital Assistant.
4. Immediately after the networking meeting, on the back top half of the business cards received, write the event’s name, date, location and if a referral, who gave you the card.
5. Keep your business cardholder handy for easy access to your fellow network members’ business cards.
6. Have pre-written, in red ink, “Thank You!” According to Tom Hopkins, author of Sales Techniques for Dummies, your business card will stand out from other business cards. Make your thank you fit the heritage, for example “Gracias” Spanish, “Xie Xie” Mandarin. 
7. Always have a sufficient quantity of your business cards with you. Keep at least 20-30 extra business cards in the glove compartment of your vehicle.
8. Keep several business cards in the side, outer coat pocket of your jacket. Right side if you are right-handed and left side if left-handed. This avoids a frantic search for your business cards.
9. When you hand out a business card, hold it chest high, with face of card facing the prospect. Surveys show that 85% of people never look at a business card before pocketing it.
10. Make sure all information on your business card is current. If you must make a correction, line out the old information with one straight line. Neatly print the new or updated information. Use outdated cards only when in a bind. Get new cards ASAP.
11. Never use business cards that are printed on too dark or glossy card stock. They can’t be written on legibly.
12. Always insert business cards in thank you notes, brochures and proposals.
13. Even job searchers should have business cards with their specialty listed.
14. Job searchers should never give out a business card with the name of a former employer company.
15. Hold your business card in your hand until you are through expanding on what’s on the card. Particularly, your position or specialty (the type work you do and what you are looking for in terms of best type business or job.)
16. When you receive a card, read it and immediately think of who you know with a similar specialty or profession. See question 2 above for examples of questions to ask.
17. Keep your electronic address book updated with the latest contact information. Several services like Plaxo.com make this easy to do.
18. Add to your new business cards the symbols for FaceBook, Twitter, RYZE, Linkedin or whatever social media site you are connected to as a member.
19. Before you hand out your business card check the back of your card for previously jotted contact information from another person.
20. If the person has run out business cards, you may offer another one of your cards for them to write their contact info.
21. Remember, effective relationship building requires you to follow up to learn how you can help or contribute in a professional way. One way to follow up is with a comment at the time you ask the person to become a friend or link on your social networking service site.

Follow Ken on Twitter, FaceBook, Linkedin, and Plaxo or visit his web site at www.fearlessnetworkers.com.

“We cannot achieve our wildest dreams by remaining who we are.” –John Maxwell

Following are 7 suggested ways to attract, connect with and build relationships with customers and associates. These ideas will help you in new business development, finding the right job or career and enhancing your social capital. I have also included what turns me off in each area.

1.     Begin by providing social media A.I.R.R. to breathe life into your connections (associates, prospects, customers) business, job or career. What’s A.I.R.R.? Advice, Information, Resources (links) and Referrals. Use social media services like my favorites: Twitter, FaceBook, Linkedin, Plaxo and social media like Podcasts, Blogs, Article Sharing links, Video clip links and Press Releases. My biggest turn-Off: Bombarding your connections with inspirational notes 10 times a day.

2.     Look to connect to individuals and groups that have common interests. Read individual and group profiles before you link, even if you have many mutual friends or like the group title. Quickly vetting web sites is also worth the time and effort. The old maxim, “You are known by the associates you keep,” still holds true in the world of social media. What are some common interests? Hobbies, pets, children in same age group, same or similar occupations, books of same genre, similar passion for a cause, similar customer type. My biggest turn-off: Linking or Friend-ing with others without checking profiles and web sites. (Tie) Someone asking me to link but refusing to share adequate profile information before I link with them.

3.     Brand yourself using specificity and a catchy title. Be known for one thing, even if you have several core competencies or specialties. What are some examples of brand specificity? A. The Fearless Networker B. The SEO Guru C. The Stealth Marketer C. The Marketing Evangelist D. The Social Media Evangelist D. The Telephone Doctor. My biggest turn-off: Being known as a “Jack-of-All-Trades” and a master of none.

4.     To increase customer satisfaction, awareness and trust, ask your customers how they would like to be communicated with via social media. What are some social media types? A. Social media service like FaceBook, Twitter, Linkedin, and Plaxo. B. An advertising service like HARPO. C. Podcasts D. Blogs E. Press Releases F. Online E-zines and newsletters. My biggest turn-off: Infrequent (few and far between) Blogs, articles, and online newsletters.

5.     It is quicker and easier to build trust with customers through social media when you do the following: A. Provide a timely and concise explanation of how you will resolve a customer complaint or request. B. Ask customers how they are enjoying ownership of your product or service. C. When customers are impressed with your stellar service, ask them to tell their associates via social media services (FaceBook, Twitter, Linkedin, Plaxo) how much they enjoyed your service or A.I.R.R. (See 1 above). Examples: A. I received terrific ideas and practical tips on how to overcome my fear of face to face networking at Ken Marsh’s Fearless Networking workshop yesterday. B. I read a tremendous book called “Radical Careering” by Sally Hogshead.  It’s chocked with helpful suggestions on finding and enjoying your job niche and career. C. Felicia Griffin’s media blog on “Drive Business by Positioning Yourself” was awesome. Read it at http://feliciagriffin.wordpress.com/2009/05/24/drive-business-by-positioning-yourself-as-a-thought-leader/.

6.     Use a social media advertising service like HARO to be seen by your key customers and gain exceptional exposure to your target market. My biggest turn-off: Not investing in advertising or marketing. (Tie) Advertising scams!

7.     It is absolutely critical to check your return-on-investment (R.O.I.) in whatever networking you are doing including social media networking. Determine whether you are generating sufficient and sustainable increased revenue for the A. Time investment B. Money invested and C. Effort extended (Sweat equity). My biggest turn-off: Not checking your R.O.I.

Read Ken P. Marsh’s weekly articles can be found on Twitter, FaceBook Plaxo and Linkedin.

“People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” –Zig Ziglar

The principles for networking for new business development and for a job can be used to build relationships across departments within a company. After all, the networking principles are based on developing trust through listening with empathy, asking the right questions at the right time and sharing reliable information, advice, resources and referrals. Following are techniques and principles to use when networking within your company:

** Initiate conversations (telephone and face-to-face) by breaking the ice and finding common ground. This can be done as follows:

1. Ask: What do you like about our company in general?
2. Ask: How do you like this weather we are having?
3. What family do you have in the area?
4. What is your hobby?
5. What do you like about the work that you do?
6. (If in the same city) When can we meeting over coffee or tea to discuss how we can help or contribute to each other’s professional development?

 Note: Often these questions will naturally have follow up questions that may help identify common interests and common values, which is the foundation of a valued relationship.

1. Do not engage in petty gossip or “pity-parties.” Always find something positive to talk about, especially when the subject relates to your company and work team.
2. Never put down or say or write negatives things about your co-workers or management verbally, via e-mail, phone or in a social media link like FaceBook or Twitter.
3. Be specific, clear and consistent in your workplace communications. Remember, reliability and consistency builds trust. Asking, “Did I clearly make my point?” will help clarify and ensure understanding of the subject matter being discussed.
4. If you sense conflict, always ask, what do you think is best for the company? Co-workers, sometimes have a tendency to take things personally. Focusing on the big picture (What is best for the company) will often lessen this tendency.
5. To be interesting, act interested by listening for understanding and focusing on asking open-ended questions beginning with who, what, when, where or how. These open-ended questions will have co-workers talking about their professional development needs, wants, and concerns.  You can be a much better resource when you have this type information. Another way to show interest in the co-worker’s work, is to research work related e-zine articles and industry literature and include such information and links in your face-to-face, email, social media and phone conversations. 
6. Always show respect, dignity and courtesy in the workplace in all interactions. Say, ‘Thank you,” ‘Would you please?’ and ‘In my opinion’. Don’t forget that written “Thank you” notes are more touching and memorable.

To learn more about fearless networking, visit Ken’s web site at www.fearlessnetworkers.com.  

Resolving to Increase Your Business and Career Networking Activities in 2010

“Success is 90% perspiration and 10% inspiration” – Author Unknown

Master business networkers know that it is extremely important to set goals, write them down and take action to achieve them. What are you doing to improve your networking skills and performance? Following are a few tips to help you to set worthwhile goals to improve your business networking skills and your business networking performance results in 2010. They also include goals in every area of their lives for a balanced life. One thing to remember is to make your goals Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Results-oriented and Time-bound, for example:  “I am happily beginning a 6-month ‘eat right’ program on Monday, January 4, 2010, as well as, a 5 times a week power-walking program to lose 40lbs by June 4, 2010.”

1.       The physical act of writing a goal on paper helps to anchor it in your mind, so write your business networking activity goals down every day, and make certain that you keep your goal centered on you and not someone else. For example, if your goal is to attend an average of six (6) more networking events in 2010 over 2009 numbers, then writing this goal down is essential to attaining this goal. Focusing on this goal, at the beginning of each week, greatly helps to achieve it.

2.       Keeping your goals in reach and accessible for review is imperative. For example, master networkers clip their goals, usually written on a 3×5 card, to their car visor for reflection and review when stuck in a traffic jam or waiting on a long train or while parked at a networking event. They do this as a quick reminder to take action on their goals.

3.       Be sure to state your goal in positive terms, as positive statements draw positive things your way.  For example, “I am consistently reaching out to at least 3 strangers weekly in 2010 to build relationships that will lead to sharing referrals” is preferable to “I am networking on a regular basis.”

4.       Share your goals only with those who have previously expressed a genuine interest in your success. For example, a mentor, supportive spouse or a caring friend.

5.       Our subconscious only understands present time.  So, if you create goals that are set in the future, your subconscious will keep those goals in the future.  For this reason, it is best to always write your goals as if they were already happening or had already happened. For example, “I am consistently sharing quality referrals with 3 associates in my networking group each week.”

6.       Right before a networking event, even as you are approaching the entrance, set an activity objective to meet x number of strangers for the purpose of relationship building with the intent to share referrals. Your subconscious won’t let you down if you are sincere about taking action to achieve your objective.

7.       State your goals clearly and precisely so that the Universe and your subconscious know exactly what YOU want.  Using strong words that evoke emotion and command action helps to call forth the energy needed to move forward. For example, “I am confidently and enthusiastically approaching 3-6 strangers tonight at this networking event.”

8.       Never let a shortfall in attaining the quantity written or referred to in your goal or objective be seen by you as a failure. For example, you may have sat a goal or objective to reach out and make a connection with three (3) people but only connected with two (2) instead. In this instance, praise yourself for reaching out to two (2) people and for striving to reach your goal or objective.

9.   And, most importantly, when you write down your goals, imagine yourself already being, doing, or having the things that you are dreaming about.  This will further activate and imprint your goals on your subconscious. For example, “I see myself smiling, poised and confident as I approach 3 strangers at this ‘after-hours’ event to help or contribute to their business or personal life.”

Your networking plan should include joining several networking groups online and offline. Also, commit to attending 2-3 networking events a week. Social media and face-to-face networking will be key ingredients of your success in 2010. Have a happy and prosperous new year!

NOTE: Find out more about networking for new business development and networking for a job at www.fearlessnetworkers.com.

“The antidote to fear is action.”

–Sally Hogshead, author of Radical Careering

The following common fears are associated with making connections and building relationships. Social networking reduces most of these fears but does not, in any way, take the place of face-to-face networking. Social media networking should be used to broaden your networking opportunities. Following these common fears, is a quote related to the number way to overcome the fear of networking:

1.            Self-promotion: Some business networkers do not like to talk about themselves, or what they have to offer in terms of products and services. For example, they will call on a referral and let the referral get them off track because they do not want to talk about who they are, and what they or their network can do for the referral. A good way to deal with the fear of self-promotion is to learn to accept who you are as a person, including your warts and your assets.

2.            Rejection: Some business networkers self-images are too closely tied to what others think of them. Allowing their self-image to be threatened can create a great deal of anxiety. The number one way to deal with the fear of rejection is to realize that true happiness is predicated on liking and accepting yourself and admiring your personal qualities and not on wanting to be liked or admired by others. Taking an inventory of your personal, admirable qualities and referring to the inventory right before attending a networking function can be a great help in reducing the fear of rejection and the dread of attending the networking event.

3.            Success: Some business networkers avoid networking because succeeding means having to change and change itself is scary: it’s easier to maintain status quo and go along unthinkingly. Life is easier when we can live it on auto-pilot. Change brings us into the unknown with its mix of exciting adventure and scary possibilities. Sometimes the fear of success is related to a fear that you will accomplish all you set out to do as a business networker and still will not be happy or content. Finally, sometimes the fear of success has to do with the feeling that you are not deserving of the good that can result from being a master networker such as increased sales, profit and business growth. The number one way to overcome the fear of success is to learn how to positively reinforce yourself for the hard work, effort, and sacrifices you’ve made to achieve success.

4.            Embarrassment: Many of us think that if we make the slightest mistake (like fumbling our 30 second elevator speech) people will laugh at us inside and regard us as complete fools.  One way to overcome the fear of embarrassment or humiliation is to realize this fear is not an accurate view of others.  The fact is that people who network with us are just like us and treat others just as we do. 

5.            Failure: Some business networkers, fear of failure may be based on not being sure what will happen at a networking event. Most people can learn to accept and even deal with the worst if they really knew what was coming. They may not like it or look forward to it, but they can deal with it. Not knowing is a different story. It creates dread, anxiety, vacillation and a very gut level desire to escape this feeling of failure by not attending the networking function. One way to deal with the fear of failure is to realize that whatever we humans have learned, we have learned only through mistakes. Then we take action by attending the networking function we are dreading attending, by seeing mistakes as opportunities to learn.

Mary Kay Ash Quote:

A new Mary Kay Cosmetics distributor approached Mary Kay Ash by mentioning her fear associated with selling the Mary Kay products. Here’s what Mary Kay Ash told her: “Fear can only settle in when our focus is inward. Take your mind off of yourself and strive to help others and when you’ve helped enough other people reach their goals, you’ll find that you have reached your own.”

The number one way to overcome the fear of networking is to focus on helping or contributing to the person you are attempting to connect with, instead of jumping into your product or service spiel.

For more information on fearless networking, go to www.fearlessnetworkers.com.